As I type this, it’s almost the middle of January and some of us may have already faltered with resolutions for the new year, that we made at the beginning of the month. Whilst I love the sense of possibility the dawning of a new year brings, I often think that making resolutions in January may not be the best time as the short, dark days and the general sluggishness we often feel after over indulging at Christmas, aren’t always conducive to making us spring into taking action towards our goals!
But the early months of the year are a great time for reflection – looking back over the year before and thinking about what went well and the things we are grateful for, as well as the challenges and struggles we experienced . . . and doing a little dreaming about our hopes and wishes for the year ahead.
I have a process I love to use to with my clients to help them do the first part of this – namely reflect and assess how their life has been over the past year – which involves asking them four questions. (Actually, this doesn’t just have to be used as one year ends and another begins – it’s a great exercise to do any time you feel stuck, need to reassess, or want to feel inspired and connected to your life).
It’s simply an awareness tool that can help you gauge the direction you’re going (question 1 & 2) and course-correct if you need to (question 3) and create a lens to see a larger deeper picture (question 4).
Here are the 4 Questions:
- What’s Working
- What’s Not Working?
- What’s Missing?
- What’s Emerging?
You can ask these four questions for any area in your life – relationship, work, finances, parenting, physical health, spiritual health, emotional/mental health etc. Do write down your answers . . . there’s power in taking the time to write them down (versus just answering them in your head).
Another tool I use with clients is the wonderful ‘Wheel of Life’, which would be a great one to add to the exercise above, as the two together would produce some powerful information.
Here’s a short video I made explaining how to complete a ‘Wheel of Life’
You can download a Wheel of Life with the categories included here, or you can download a blank one here.
Once you have evaluated and assessed last year, and seen the areas of your life you would like to improve or change, as well as any dreams and wishes you have for the year ahead, you can use this final activity to help you get into ACTION!
Its all about creating what’s called ‘Commitment Statements’ to take you from where you are to where you want to be. Here’s the formula:
For each goal you want to achieve or situation you want to change answer the following 3 questions:
- How it is, is:
- What I want is
- I am committed to:
Looks simple, and it is. But it’s a really powerful process when you take time to really think about each question, and write down your answers in as much detail as you can.
Curious questions you could ask yourself about each commitment statement you make are things like:
How might I ………………..?/What would have to be true for me to ……………….. ?/What are the barriers keeping me from ………………?
If you work through the exercises I have shared with you today, I promise you you’ll continue on in this new year with a renewed sense of purpose and passion and there is a very good chance that you will succeed in the areas you have committed to. Do let me know how you get on!
Warmest wishes
Frances x
If you would like to help your child assess the past year, and set goals for 2025, do have a look at my recent posts on my Brighter Futures for Kids blog for guidance on how to do this.